In a week of endless stories about the horrors our species inflicts on each other, let’s lighten the mood with some mindless chatter about wrestling. There’s a seedy side to wrestling (actually it’s more seedy than a box of Trill), but it’s a lot less horrifying than stories of mass shootings, gang rape, murder and religious hatred that have been all over the news during the past week.
There isn’t a movie or TV show that is more disturbing, terrifying, or that perfectly lays bare how messed up and horrendous we are as a species, than the nightly news. Apart from Britain’s Got Talent, obviously.
So let’s focus on something positive, like WWE’s NXT Takeover show. Yes, that was an awkward crunching of gears you heard, just ignore it, we’re going in the right direction now.
It’s been a solid year for WWE shows. Wrestlemania, Extreme Rules and Elimination Chamber all had their high points. That said, my favourite WWE show of the year so far is NXT Takeover. As a two hour wrestling show, this bad boy delivered on all fronts and left me smiling from ear to ear. Why was it so good? I’ll tell you…
If there’s only one thing TNA should copy from WWE (and God knows they take enough) it’s the way they set up the NXT arena. The IMPACT Zone always looks so sparse, cold and devoid of real atmosphere. Granted, a lot of that is down to the tourist crowd, but the set up of the building doesn’t help.
The NXT arena looked packed, well lit and the kind of place that is perfect for watching wrestling. In today’s world of always judging books by their covers, good production is massively important. NXT have it down to a fine art.
The smark heavy student crowd were fantastic. They were hot for the matches. They knew all the wrestlers. They knew all the storylines and what was going on. Guys like Adam Rose, Sami Zayn and Adrian Neville came across like big stars. So did Paige, who was welcomed back like a returning war hero.
The crowd were funny too. Not in the usual ‘let’s take over the show by chanting for JBL for no reason’ way. They actually made me laugh. When a chunk of hair went flying during the Women’s Title match, they chanted ‘weave’ as Bret Hart tried to kick it under the ring without anyone noticing.
Plus they sang, chanted, cheered, booed and generally made NXT come across as the hottest and most fun wrestling show in the world. Full marks for the Full Sail smarks.
While Sami Zayn vs. Tyler Breeze would be the match of the night on any other night, at NXT Takeover the undoubted highlight was the final of the NXT Women’s Championship tournament between Nattie Neidhart and Charlotte.
This was the best women’s match I’ve ever seen in WWE. Sure you’ve had matches with bigger names, on bigger stages, but Nattie vs. Charlotte had everything that makes a wrestling match great.
First off, the match went 18 minutes – which is longer than the combined time of every women’s match on RAW and Smackdown this year. Secondly, it made the NXT Women’s Title seem like a massive deal. Thirdly, it had a great backstory and strong personalities playing supporting roles, with Bret Hart and Ric Flair cornering their niece and daughter respectively. Fourthly, it was just a bloody brilliantly worked match.
A lot of credit needs to go to Nattie Neidhart, who in one match was more impressive than in her entire WWE career to date. She carried Charlotte when needed and was very convincing in her role as the confident and hard hitting veteran of the division. She’s a butthead on Total Divas (which is a bigger work than WWE) but she showed just how great a worker she is with this match. Credit where it’s due, I don’t believe there’s another woman on the roster that could’ve worked a match this good, with someone as inexperienced as Charlotte.
It always takes two to tango and while Nattie deserves most of the credit for how great this match was, Charlotte more than held up her side of things. She is probably the most athletic woman in WWE and she makes great use of her natural athletic ability. Where she excelled was by showing her personality and a little bit of Flair greatness. Her use of the Sharpshooter and the little smirk she gave Bret before doing it was right out of her Dad’s playbook.
Ric Flair and Bret Hart really added to the story of this match. While Flair was much more animated than Bret (what else did you expect) they both brought an air of importance and legitimacy to the match. Bret’s line of, “Harts don’t lose to Flairs” was great. Flair in full freak out mode on the outside during the match added to the drama. They didn’t overshadow the match or get involved in it, instead it was all about Nattie and Charlotte competing for the title. The perfect use of two legends.
The match built expertly and incorporated great submission attempts, MMA inspired mat work and almost no missed spots or clumsy moments. I would love to know how much input Flair and Bret had on the structure of this match because it was perfectly paced.
The post-match tears and celebrations were more than just selling a victory. Nattie and Charlotte proved to everyone watching (and hopefully those in power in the back) that women’s wrestling can be just as intense, heated, meaningful and entertaining as their male counterparts – if they’re given the time and opportunity.
It’s one of the best matches you’ll see this year. Go watch it and see what professional wrestling looks like when it’s treated seriously and presented as a legitimate sporting contest. In fact, apart from the campy fun of Adam Rose, this show had a very old school and serious feel to it.
Simple feuds built around in-ring issues and Titles, great interviews that put over the characters and motivations of the wrestlers, and commentary that helped rather than hindered. Seriously, if this is HHH’s vision of WWE when he’s in charge (NXT is his baby) then the future looks damn bright. Go watch this show, now!
Hey IWC, quick question: if CM Punk sends a tweet, and it’s got nothing to do with wrestling, do you still pee your pants? Twitter is utterly hilarious when it comes to CM Punk and his recent resurfacing as a retired wrestler, hockey enthusiast and Talking Dead couch sitter.
I love CM Punk as a performer. I think he’s one of the best wrestlers in the world and WWE is much worse off without him, but God damn you’d think Jesus had come back to Earth the way some people went off when Punk sent a hockey related tweet last week.
It’s not surprising Punk has kept such a low profile over the last four months. I don’t think some marks realise just how creepy and desperate they come off when they’re bombarding Punk with questions and messages. I’d stay of Twitter too with those freaks on my case all day, every day.
People were proclaiming (with all the certainty and confidence in the world) that Punk tweeting again meant he would be back at Payback. Of course, he wasn’t. As I pointed out on Twitter, if you really want to see CM Punk that badly, start watching Blackhawk games, where you’re guaranteed to see him every week, sitting in the crowd and looking pleased with himself.
Maybe the message that Punk is really gone from WWE will finally get through when his contract is up next month. While he could come back in the future, I hope once July rolls around and his contract expires, people will accept he’s done with WWE for now and let the guy tweet about stupid hockey stuff, without being bombarded by a million desperate marks. And no, he doesn’t owe you a fucking explanation, stop being so needy and demanding.
Actually once his contract ends it’ll probably be worse because people will then start speculating about him going to TNA (bwahahahahahahahaha) or joining Jeff Jarrett’s promotion – which at the moment looks like a travel blog for trips to Mexico and some vague media speak about ‘new eras’ and ‘wrestling presented in a different way than before.’ If it’s different from TNA, I’ll give it a shot. Just don’t expect CM Punk to do the same thing.
Speaking of Twitter, would it be too much for someone to produce a glossary of wrestling terms and arrange for every wrestling fan on Twitter to read it? Yes, I know it would be. I’m not that stupid. I’d just love for something like that to be produced because it’s beyond annoying to see countless fans misusing so many terms, every single day on Twitter.
Now I’m not some grizzled wrestling veteran. I’ve never been in a wrestling ring, locker room or booking meeting. I’ve never drawn any money. I’ve never booked a show. Yet, sometimes on Twitter, it feels like I’m the only one who hasn’t.
What I know about wrestling has been learned from over twenty five years of watching, reading and listening to the thoughts, opinions and stories of people within wrestling like Jim Cornette, Raven, Konnan, Lance Storm, Jim Ross and countless others, plus reading the opinions and research on the business by journalists like Dave Meltzer. Of course my own opinions have been formed from that, but my understanding of ‘working’ or ‘drawing money’ or ‘selling’ comes from learning from people within the wrestling business.
It seems to me that the vast majority of people on Twitter have a vocabulary of wrestling that can only come about through years working within the heart of the industry. I honestly had no idea so many 16 year olds had worked in professional wrestling. They casually throw out insider terms and phrases with such confidence about their meanings it’s truly amazing.
That is until you actually read the context they’re using these words and phrases in. Then it becomes painfully obvious that these guys have absolutely no idea what they’re talking about.
Let’s hope someone in the know puts together a glossary of insider wrestling terms, with explanations and definitions, so that I can go one day without choking on my own rage as someone guy who ‘works in the business’ (once set up a row of chairs at an indy show) goes off on another rant about someone being ‘buried’ in WWE, when he really has no clue what he’s talking about. I know it’s a big ask, but I think this could be one of the most important publications in wrestling history.
Speaking of wrestling publications, I’ve found something quite interesting recently. As anyone who knows me will attest, I’m a massive wrestling nerd. To the point where I watch at least one of hour of the stuff every day (having the WWE Network is pushing that number closer to three with each passing week) and I constantly read old editions of Wrestling Observer to try and learn more about wrestling history and also so I don’t constantly misuse insider terms while trying to sound cool on Twitter.
Anyway, I’ve been making my way through 1991-1992 back issues of the Observer and it’s amazing to read the complaints about WCW during that time, are the same complaints made about TNA today.
It is really eerie to see the similarities (dwindling attendances, stagnant TV ratings, all the big name talent leaving, copying what WWE do, turning people too often) and how TNA are continuing down the same path of mistakes that WCW made in the early 90s. Even the money man keeping the company afloat (Bob Carter now, Ted Turner back then), despite little to no return on the investment has been repeated.
Of course the mistakes and creative disasters of WCW were made right (at least for a few years) thanks to Eric Bischoff turning the entire company on its head, signing the WWE guys he did and swiping the NWO angle from Japan.
Everyone knows how that story ended (with WCW losing over £60 million in one year and eventually dying) but there’s no doubt that the massive shake up of all aspects of WCW that Bischoff speared headed took the company out of the doldrums and onto huge success. It didn’t last, but it did work for a while.
If there’s one thing TNA are desperately crying out for, it’s a creative reinvention. They’ve followed the template set down by WWE for years and it’s got them to a certain level. They will never rise above their current level without an overhaul of everything they do. If TNA want to progress they need to change and every company (wrestling or otherwise) should always want to progress and improve.
I don’t have a name I can pull of a hat and say with any confidence that they will sort out the issues with TNA. Hell, maybe it’s Jeremy Borash who said the most sensible and interesting thing he’s ever said recently, namely that TNA should relocate to the UK as soon as possible and tour extensively here and in Europe, to take advantage of their higher levels of popularity than they have in the US. Hey, at least it’s a better idea than a Jeff Hardy fitness app.
Reading those old Observers about early 90s WCW and reading comments about today’s TNA proves that people in wrestling never learn from the mistakes of the past.
The Observer readers in the early 90s predicted the end of WCW if it kept going the way it was and they were probably right. People have been predicting the end of TNA from about the second weekly PPV they put on in 2002. WCW had to make a drastic change because Ted Turner didn’t want to lose any more money and he made a final roll of the dice with Bischoff. Maybe Bob Carter will get to that point soon and TNA will be forced to make their final roll of the dice.
A roll that everyone who is a fan of wrestling should hope comes up a winner because a successful TNA is something the wrestling industry as a whole badly needs. Total reinvention isn’t easy but in TNA’s case it’s becoming increasingly necessary, with each disappointing house show crowd and with each stagnant TV rating. They just can’t keep slowly fading.
Aw man, I wanted to keep this light and positive and here I am, moaning about TNA and predicting doom and gloom. Still, at least it’s not as depressing and distressing as anything you’ll see on the news tonight, although Brittney wrestling Velvet Sky from IMPACT last week could be classed as a crime against humanity.
Time for shameless plugs, you have been warned. You can follow me on Twitter @MFXDuckman where you’ll find me making fun of people freaking out about CM Punk and then freaking out myself when someone misuses the phrase ‘kayfabe.’ It’s loads of fun.
You know what else is fun? The MFX podcast, that’s what. Each week my partner-in-crime Sir Ian Trumps and I take to the airwaves for a few hours of smarky chat and non-stop hilarity. Our Unleashed show at the start of the week is all about pop culture, news, sport, TV and movies. Our wrestling show at the end of the week reviews IMPACT and RAW.
You can find the show on the MFX page here. Or by going to www.mfxpodcast.com where you can find out all our shows, for both downloading and streaming. We’re also on ITunes and Stitcher, just search for Marks for Xcellence.
As always, thanks for reading and keep supporting SLTD and all the great people that make this site what it is.
Until next time…
Peace
Duckman
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