I want to start off this week by talking about a couple of non-Raw things:
- The fact that WWE (during Black History month no less) have not paid respect to Big Daddy V/Mabel/Viscera on-air is a total disgrace. He may not have been a huge main-event player in his day, but he was an asset to the company and you owe him at least 5 seconds to show a graphic during Raw or SmackDown. Hell, show it during Main Event…do something!
- I have managed to get the WWE Network up and running (shh!), and it’s nothing short of amazing. Yes, there are technical hiccups, but for the most part, it’s great. The sheer amount of content on it is astounding. The back catalogue of Raw’s and SmackDown’s isn’t what I’d hoped, but they might be added in the future. If you have PayPal and know what you’re doing, you can easily get access to it anywhere
Anyway, onto Raw and all its Brothers (and predictable set-ups) for the week.
Hulk Hogan’s Mom definitely got around!
So either Hulk Hogan’s mom was as loose as a 7 week old band-aid, or Hulk’s getting paid commission every time he says the word “brother”. Seriously. I lost count somewhere around 57 in the first 5 minutes!
Yes, Hogan is back, and he’s hosting WrestleMania 30. The crowd reaction was great, even though it wasn’t a surprise thanks to TMZ and their degenerate news hounds, but it was still a fun opening to Raw. Luckily, it didn’t culminate in him laying out a heel who decided to come out and besmirch (© William Regal) America!
The less we see of Hogan up till Mania the better. His whole persona should be built around less is more, otherwise it just gets annoying.
Grade: B for Brother, D for shock value
They’re Really Doing Orton Vs Batista Aren’t They?
I sincerely thought we would get a Daniel Bryan win at Elimination Chamber, coupled with an obviously needed Batista heel turn. It would have prevented the backlash that this match will obviously face at Mania. I mean, I can honestly see fans throwing garbage in the ring for this one.
From reading the SmackDown spoilers this morning, it seems that they’re turning Batista out of necessity, but he’s still facing Orton, so it doesn’t fix anything. They could’ve had Daniel Bryan step in and make it a triple threat (by adding a stipulation to the Kane and Daniel Bryan match), but it seems like we’re full steam ahead on Daniel Bryan vs Triple H (more on that later).
The only thing I can think of now is Punk suddenly re-appearing to inject himself into the main-event and freshen it up a little, but I honestly don’t see that happening.
Oh, and Alberto got the win on Batista after an Orton distraction.
Grade: B for Bootista, F for fucking up the main-event of Mania
Hogan Is Back, So No More Real Americans!
Are the Real Americans breaking up because Hogan’s back and he’s the only one who can be a Real American in town? Who knows, but it can only be good news for Antonio Cesaro, who still seems to be on the rise in WWE.
The jealous tag partner thing is already being done over in The Shield’s camp, but there’s no reason why it can’t work here too. The only issue I have with it is that there were 2 much better ways to go about doing it:
- Have Jack Swagger beat Big E at the Chamber and then have him Lord it over Cesaro that he could get the job done, but Cesaro couldn’t – leading to a match for the belt at Mania. It would give the title some prestige and make it relevant, while also giving them something to feud over other than petty jealousy
- Make Big E and Cesaro’s match on Raw for the title, and have Cesaro win it. Then Swagger and Cesaro switch roles and we get the same result – an IC Title match between them at Mania
But it is what it is now. There’s still time to have one of them win the belt and for a subsquent feud, but I don’t see it happening. I like Big E, but I don’t see him doing anything relevant with the title at Mania, so I’d do the switch soon and capitalise on it. Cesaro deserves the number 2 title after the last couple of weeks he’s had!
Grade: A for Antonio, and A for the match because it was pretty fantastic!
Cena and Wyatt might be off
I’ll just sit here where my career is safe from you, John
Ignoring the Cena promo, because it was nothing new, it looks like John Cena may be injured. This can mean a couple of things:
- It’s a work to make him look weaker – which devalues Bray Wyatt instantly (win or lose)
- It’s real – in which case someone in the Wyatt family is to blame and they’ll be instantly punished.
Either option is bad. I personally wouldn’t mind seeing The Shield/Wyatts feud head into Mania and finish with a 6-man TLC match where the Wyatts go over, thanks to Ambrose finally snapping and turning on Reigns.
Someone pointed out that if Cena is legit injured and has to miss Mania (which I don’t see happening), then it’ll be the first Mania since 19 that he’s missed!
I don’t care about Sheamus vs Christian
Moving on…
Bryan vs Kane is over, time for Bryan vs HHH…
Bryan now has a ton of momentum heading in to WrestleMania, but if there’s one thing that can derail said momentum time and time again, it’s good ol’ Trips. I sincerely hope Bryan beats him because if he doesn’t, it completely defeats the purpose of everything that’s happened since SummerSlam. I’d also like to see a stipulation added that sees Bryan become number 1 contender for the title if he wins.
I will proceed with cautious optimism. Bryan’s post-match promo on Triple H was scathing and really blurred the lines (sexist skirt comment aside) between fantasy and reality. Bryan has to be a little pissed at his treatment and booking in real life.
Hair Hair Everywhere
The battle of the long hairs happened on Raw and it was good. Surprisingly good.
A lot of people are questioning Roman Reigns’ ability to go at it in a long singles match, and we still haven’t truly seen that, but what little he has done in singles competition has been good (to great) depending on the day. He’s improving all the time and developing a unique personality in the ring, which every top guy needs to do. Bray Wyatt’s the same, and if these guys are the future of the company, then the future looks very bright indeed.
Ambrose continues to evolve into more of a crazy psycho every week. This week, he was wearing a leather jacket, which just added to it. I don’t know why…
Seems like the feud between the two factions is destined to continue for now, until the Cena situation is cleared up.
Gong In 60 Seconds
First off, I can’t not mention that Undertaker’s chin fuzz looks like it was coloured by the same guy that does Kevin Nash’s beard!
This Brock vs Undertaker match makes me nervous. There’s no way it can be anything special. Brock will have to play it safe with Taker because he might actually kill him, and Brock’s at his best when he just unleashes everything and throws people around like rag dolls. It’s a big money match for sure, but the value for the viewer is something that I just don’t see at this point. Also, Undertaker attacking Brock is just plain weird since he hasn’t done anything to physically warrant it.
That’s gonna do it for me for this week. I’m not overly enthused about Mania, but I get to watch it on the Network in glorious HD so it’s not too bad. The matches being set up are predictable and mostly bad. Considering this year is the 30th anniversary of WrestleMania, I expected a little bit more. Hopefully we get a few curve balls thrown at us over the next couple of weeks to make WrestleMEHnia become WreeeessssttllleeeeMAAAAAANIIIAAAA!
Peace!
Don’t forget to check out the Raw edition of MFX podcast on the site this week. It’s always good for a laugh…or several….thousand!
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